Fly on the Wall

Now I want you to get into a comfortable position. Your head should feel heavy, feet grounded, back straight and softly focus on something in front of you. As you take a deep breath in, slowly close your eyes and envision your favourite place… Oh it’s this blog? Great. Now let’s get to it.  

My favourite place is the farm. The stillness, the freshness, the worn barn, the lived in house and the flies… 

I cannot forget the flies because they always know the perfect time to visit. Happy Hour? Flies. BBQing? Flies. Grandma’s ankles are showing? Flies. They even bite!

It’s funny how a place can have so many wonderful memories, yet one little insect is the star of the show. 

In Buy it, Use it, Break it, Fix it my knees buckled. Today, I wish my pants had buckles. 

The tours at the facility are ideally around thirty minutes, but many were well over sixty. At about the forty-five minute mark, I began to lose my patience and my pace sped up.  

I realize how important it is to find the perfect place for moms, dads and spouses, but at 12:00pm, no one seemed to care that food is important to me. 

One morning I had forgotten that I was scheduled for a tour (even though I guide a tour on the same day at the same time) and I happened to be walking passed the front reception around 11:00am.  The Receptionist called out, “Oh good you’re here for your tour!” Since I was taken off guard, I told her I needed to quickly use the washroom beforehand. 

The tour was one of those one hour long tours. I slowly made my way to the front doors that just so happen to automatically open when you walk past… 

Standing by my desk, I glanced down and realized that my fly was down and my shiny pink underwear was exposed. It must have been like this since I went to the washroom prior to the tour. At least I hadn’t noticed any wandering eyes, but perhaps that’s why the gentleman stayed for so long…

At that moment, I had wished this fly was on the wall instead of on my pants.